The first time you shop at certain stores, the check-out line policy may be murky: One line for all registers? Or one line per register?
At PetCo, a lesson learned re: judging a book by its cover, judging milk by its foul smell--A seemingly sweet old lady asked us which line we were in. Puzzled, as I thought only one line existed, I began to answer: I don't know, I thought--SHEYELLED,"WELL,PICKALINE!!!" I asked her not to yell at me (not sure she heard me). She went off to start her own line. Time travel (direction:back): While she was walking around the store, all the dogs were barking at her, and she muttered something about how dogs hate her.
~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~/~(brain partition)
Also, when I used to walk to work, I would pass by these two cute dogs every day, who were being walked by their human. They were sweet and would come up to me. ::Sniff:Sniff:: Time travel (direction: back): I used to order clothing off youth catalogs. I ordered what I thought was a fake suede coat on sale for $20. Logic = real suede not cheap. Time travel (direction: forward, location: after 2nd sentence, this paragraph): I wore that coat once, and on that day only, those two cute dogs were really, really upset with me. !!Bark!Bark!! I never wore that coat to work again, and thus, happily ever after.
If Only a Dog . . .
Back in the day when I still ordered food from movie theater concession stands, back when I still went to watch movies alone, a fat, lonely woman once found her way in line behind me. !!Kerplunk!! ::Boink:: It only took one look at me before she decided she hated me, and whether it was because I was young, nonwhite, or much skinnier I do not know. !Ssss!
I ordered a HOT DOG, but they were not ready for consumption yet (% raw), and would not be for another 10 minutes. I gave pretzels a shot, but likewise, they were not ready either (% doughy dough). Those were my top two choices, and since they were both unavailable, I had to take a look at what else was available. (No, please, popcorn makes my stomach ill.) But that look I took was unbearable to the woman with a hook for a mouth behind me, who shook with RRRRRAGE. She was hungry, she was lonely, and she was on the prowl.
She took a bite out of me, erstwhile yelling that there were people behind me (mostly, her). How dare I not know what to order before I got up to the stand! Never mind that they weren't ready to serve what was on their menu. Never mind that a person sized like me could never satiate a woman like her. GRRR & tear!In a classic dreamlike move where things/motives seem to switch gear, she transformed the attack on me into a flirty conversation with the older man behind the counter, though skillful as she was, she kept one eye on me. "Can you believe these rude, ungrateful people who think they can have whatever they want? Who do they think they are to be so demanding?" The man did not look impressed; he did not want to deal with either of us. Rather, he thought of his starving son at home, the son for whom he had stolen all the hot dogs/pretzels.
I considered saying something to this historical/hysterical woman, as I am known to do, but this woman was obviously not all she wanted to be, and assaulting that kind of person in any kind of way would be:
but mostly
I wish more parts of life were.
